Tragedi Januari 2012

It was Tuesday, 10 January 2012..

Both Eimaan and me were in the wet kitchen..i did the dishes when there was honking in front..it was the weekly cleaner and she was a bit early than usual..Eimaan was sitting on the floor playing plastic cups..I wiped my hands and rushed out to open the door when he as expected followed behind me but tripped and fell down..I pull him up and this was one of the unforgettable moments in my whole life when i saw the skin above his left brow was gaped open and blood trickled along his cheeks..even worst, i could see his white skull inside..menangis nya usah tanya la..mesti dia sgt sakit..i carried him to the front and had panic attack..with the honking outside the gate, the blood, the cries, i could'nt think straight at that moment..with shaky hands i managed to call my husband..he was like 'what happen?how?when?'..i just said 'balik cepat..KEPALA EIMAAN DAH PECAH NI'..and he..entahla, bayangkan aje la mcm mana pecut nye dia.

Then only i pushed the auto-gate button and called for help with hand gesture..there were many of them inside the van and they came rushing inside..lagi soalan bertubi2 macam mana boleh jadi..masa tu i dah menangis-nangis sambil dukung Eimaan yang menangis..they asked me to open the grill so they could help..again i terkocoh-kocoh ambil kunci, opened the grill dan minta mereka ambilkan tisu and kain..they offered to send us to the hospital but i refused saying my husband is on the way..luckily husband's office and home is just 10 minutes drive..again and again they offered but i had to refuse..bila i tekapkan kain di dahi Eimaan, he cried even louder..i passed Eimaan to one of the maid and ran inside the bedroom and changed to proper blouse, pant and tudung..i knew the maids got other job to do, so i said okayla, u all can go..i boleh tunggu my husband.dengan serba salah all the maids pun pergi..with Eimaan on my arm, i started to pack his bag, his milk and locked all the doors and windows..hubby arrived in less than 10mins since i called, and of course was shocked looking at Eimaan..but Eimaan actually has stopped crying 5mins ago..

If im not mistaken, we reached Emergency, Pantai Hospital after 20 minutes since Eimaan fell down..we rushed him inside and he started screaming looking at those unfamiliar stranger faces..no choices, but they swaddled him with the blanket, masukkan ubat tahan sakit, and cleaned his wound..doc tanya lots of question but i can't concentrate and tahan mata dari nangis..but of course i managed to answer every Q's..then they put plaster on Eimaan..done!

DONE??No no..not done yet..of course there will be stitches involved..since it was very deep cut and Eimaan being super active boy, they had to do minor operation.in the OT..hubby did all the papers and we admit in paediatric ward..i changed Eimaan to hospital gown while lovely and super-nice nurses came in and out giving things and masukkan tiub air on Eimaan's hand..hubby kena balik ambil hospital card Eimaan, my handphone, Eimaan's TEDDY BEAR, and other necessity.

4 pm..Eimaan on my lap and i was on the wheelchair, pushed by the nurse to the OT..URGHH,OT for the second time.and yeah, MIL, SIL and niece were there too..talking about MIL, sampai je mereka mommy Eimaan mata dah bergenang tak tau kenapa..maybe sbb finally got someone to share my worries..and kena sound juga sebab Eimaan jatuh..sobs sobs..mana de mak yang sengaja nak anak die sakit kan ;( ..but i understand org tua mmg macam tu..sgt risaukan cucu..(jgn salah faham, MIL pya sound tu ala2 perli je tp paham2 sendiri la)..sampai depan OT, i kena changed to OT gown and crocs..kena masuk temankan Eimaan..mula-mula mmg meronta la, semua nurse kena pegang, then the specialist doc bagi gas untuk tidokan Eimaan..kesian nye masa tu..bergenang lg air mata..at 5pm operation done! Alhamdulillah doc kata nothing serius cuma the cut mmg very deep..luckily tak kena skull.

Eimaan's daddy punya 1st worry ialah SCAR..risau anaknye dah tak handsome..;)

After all, i blamed myself for everything because Eimaan masih kecil..die tak tau ape.all he knows is running around.as a parent, kita yg patut provide a safe place for our babies and tots.lepas tu baru terhegeh-hegeh beli all the child proofing, but after a while, all did'nt work and terbukak..hurmm..blur dah dgn child proof..

If this happening to u, doctor pesan TEKAPKAN KAIN PADA LUKA TERSEBUT AGAR KUMAN TAK MASUK..
Dont PANIC of course and i hope and wish none of you will encounter this kind of situation..JGN LEPAS PANDANG ON OUR KIDS..;)

P.S:entry yg ambil masa 1 week..punyela malas.


the wound terpaksa diblurkan kerana rupa asalnya agak mengerikan


tempat kejadian-in between wet and dry kitchen


evening after operation-still in sleeping dose


night after operation-still mamai dengan bius

Eimaan & Cloth Diapers

I sendiri masih belajar mengenai CD ni..tentang cara 'handling' nya, jenis-jenis nya and masih ingin mencuba pelbagai jenis brand so that we can compare which one better..just to share with u guys, Eimaan got his first CD from his nina(my ibu) as a gift..she gave it to me since i was 7 months pregnant..brand-COOLABABY..2 pieces CD in blue and green..so cute..masa tu i masih blur mcm mana la nak guna CD ni..macam menyusahkan je nak basuh semua..at the same time, i juga dpt feedback from friends yg mmg guna CD ni on their babies..semua cakap bagus, save duit, selamat, etc..

Therefore, i bought more of it..i did'nt start early on Eimaan sebab rasa macam besar je CD tu walaupun dah adjust to smallest size..if im not mistaken i started when he was 5-6 months..once tried, mmg sgt suka..cuma mmg terlalu byk 'M' inside that made me 'on' and 'off'..'on' nye sekejap..'off' nye lama.hihi..bila 'on' balik tu, mula la menambah lagi..so total Eimaan dah ada 7 pieces of CD..6 pieces of COOLABABY and 1 piece of Autumnz..and a roll of Grovia liner..lepas tu 'off' balik for a long time and now 'on' balik..haii nasib la Eimaan dapat mommy yg mcm ni..

Memandangkan dah nak 'on' balik berCD ni, in fact this time azam lebih kuat nak FULLY CD (moga-moga tercapai la kali ni), mula la balik episod surf online baby shop to find better range of CD..last night i slept at 2am surfing internet..more infos yang i dapat mengenai CD ni..

Rupa-rupanya ada pelbagai jenis CD..i hanya kenal pocket diaper je..


1. ALL IN TWO (AI2)

Ramai mommies yg pengguna tegar CD (on their baby not them okay..hihi) bagi feedback that this is the best..WHY?

All in Two Diapers have 2 basic parts - a waterproof layer and an exchangeable absorbent layer that lays on top of the waterproof cover.

When the diaper is soiled, the dirty soaker can simply be exchanged for a clean soaker and the waterproof outer reused.

This means a compact system that is great for out and about with baby and reduces your laundry size.
Source: Tiny Tapir

So, unlike normal pocket diaper yang i guna currently, dengan AI2, outer dia boleh digunakan balik cuma tukar soaker yang lapisan atas tu saja..manakala pocket diaper biasa, kena tukar keseluruhannya..sebab AI2 tak guna insert tapi sejenis absorbent layer yang boleh ditukar..tetapi diingatkan juga, waterproof layer yang bawah tu digunakan dalam dua kali sahaja for hygenic reason..;)


2. ALL IN ONE (AIO)

All in One Diapers mean just that - it's exactly like a disposable diaper with a waterproof layer, absorbent layers in the middle and a stay dry layer against baby's skin.

Some AIOs have the option of a pocket to add extra soakers to boost absorbency.
Source: Tiny Tapir

This type pula macam disposable diapers yang kita guna tu la, cuma material nya ialah CLOTH..


3. POCKET (ONE SIZED)

A Pocket is a waterproof outer layer and an inner layer of microfleece or suede (to keep baby feeling dry).

There's an opening either in the back or front of the the diaper to insert soakers of your choice, so you choose the absorbency of the diaper.
Source: Tiny Tapir

Pocket (ONE SIZED) ni pula merangkumi waterproof outer, inner dari material microfleece/suede dan ade macam pocket untuk kita masukkan 'insert' dia..Jadi untuk baby yang heavy wetter tu bolehlah pakai 2 inserts or 1 insert+1 hemp..depends pada keperluan..;) Dan kenapa pula 'ONE SIZED'? Sebab button2 yang banyak2 pada CD tu kita boleh adjust untuk size S,M,L,XL..Sampai our tots dah nak potty training boleh pakai..SAVE KANN??


OK, jom tengok collection CD Eimaan.


lovess the bright colors..;)



Grovia Liner



letak mcm ni ok..tak tau la kalau mommies semua ada cara lain ;)



comot belemuih nye anak mommy.;)


Eimaan punya 7 keping aje? Mana cukup nak fully CD kan..So, after survey punya survey last night, i've decided to buy Rumparooz and Bumgenius..Mommies semua kalau ader suggestions brand apa lagi yang best, lemme know kay, TQ.;)

Flashback: First time masuk OT

Alhamdulillah..Eimaan Harith safely delivered on 10.16pm, 15 August 2010..After doc cut his umbilical cord, they brought him away..tak puas jumpa baby..but my labor was not done yet..there was still another task i had to do which was to pushed out the 'uri'..huhhh..ingat dah bertarung nyawa berejam dah sudah..to push out the uri tak la susah, doc helped me by tekan2 dekat perut tu...then zzuuppp keluar..rasa lega..tak sakit ape pun okay..yang sakit tu masa contraction, i could'nt imagine koyak down there, but i did'nt feel a thing..tak sakit pun..BUT..once doc pegang jarum and started the stitching, i was like jerk jerk and jerk..boleh rasa okay..sgt tak best..i thought it was over until suddenly doc told me i had lots of koyakan inside..it can't be done here with me jerking constantly..the koyakan happened when baby struggled inside to come out..i was like 'WHAT..WHAT ELSE DO I HAVE TO ENDURE..I CANT POSSIBLY BEAR THE PAIN ANYMORE..;('..doc said, 'okay dont worry..we'll do it in OT(Operation Theater)..u wont feel any pain cuz we'll give u anesthetic to make u paralyzed from waist downwards..i said yeah..as long i tak rasa sakit lagi..;)

Meanwhile, i looked on my right where hubby held the baby..there was a nurse in front of them..i found out later that hubby was reciting azan on baby's ears at that time and hubby was crying while azan..owww..so syahdu..rugi tak dapat dengar..

At 11pm that night, nurses pushed me out on the stretcher..there were my family-in-laws outside..MIL,SIL,BIL and nieces..i smiled and waved at them..they pushed me to the OT and awaiting was a surgery team..they asked me lots of Q such as any allergy, etc..pakar bius then gave the injection di tulang belakang (macam epidural)..few minutes later, i cant feel anything waist downwards and doc started his work. Meanwhile i chit-chatted with the assistants, that doc pakar bius, bla bla bla menyembang...macam2 kami sembang.. i dont know why i hyper satu macam..i supposed to be worn out and sleepy kan..tapi i bersembang mcm kt kedai kopi...very sporting all the assistants..rupenye that was their procedure to keep me awake during the surgery..;)

Everything was done at 12am..it's been 2 hours since i last saw my baby..in fact i have'nt met him properly..hubby waited in our room..nurse put me on my bed..MISTAKE AGAIN: I SHOULD ASK FOR MY BABY..I SHOULD NURSE HIM RIGHT AWAY ..again, i sgt la blur being 1st timer.i tried to sleep but i was hyper, active n segar..i updated fb status..i chit-chatted with hubby sampai hubby pun dah mengantuk..i cant sleep, i felt hot (due from the anesthetic)..when the nurse came to checked me at 3am, i asked her to sejukkan lagi bilik tu..hubby sgt sejuk and i gave him my blanket..i cant remember when i finally fall asleep but i started to feel the pain berdenyut-denyut around 5am..bius dah mula hilang..urghh..

Early morning, i woke up..doc checked my stitches and pulled out the pad he shoved inside me last night..after dah keluarkan pad tu, baru rasa lega sikit..i've been told to walk around, eat my breakfast and have some shower..at 10am the nurse brought my baby in..she urged me to breastfed my baby and the 1st attempt failed..maybe susu masih tak ada and baby did'nt latched on properly..okay, i tak nak panic.i fikir nanti balik boleh cuba lagi..MIL came when it was time to discharge and helped me to hold Eimaan..by noon we arrived at MIL'S house and started my 1st day of confinement..;)



Eimaan first day

You guys nak tau what i've learn from these??

1. Breastfeed your baby right away agar baby dapat colostrum (susu awal lembuibu) yg sgt berkhasiat tu..
2. Minta dari nurse kalau mereka tak bagi (some hospital, nurse mereka dah di ajar untuk terus bagi baby untuk menyusu badan ibu die right after bersalin)
3. If u were on something like my case, kena masuk OT, i tak tau sama ada boleh atau tak, but i should at least ask whether i can breastfeed my baby tak kira la kalau masa tu dah pukul 1 pagi pun..
4. Sebaiknya minta baby every 2 hours untuk disusukan supaya our breast akan dapat rangsangan bg mengeluarkan susu dengan lebih banyak lagi..
5. Bak kata my idol Harlinda Halim, 'breastfeeding is a learning process'..jgn putus asa jika baby tak dapat menyusu betul on our breast..kena ajar dengan sabar..SABAR..

Flashback to Aug 2010-Delivery Day

15 August 2010

11.00 am

It has been 3 days after my doc has told me im 2cm dilated..there were some blood spotted on my panty ever since.it was not much, like when u had your first day of menstrual..three days in row had fingers 'poked' in and out to check dilation..urghhh..dilation was progressing well since the 1st day though there were 1 time the number decreased..i can feel minor contraction every 10 minutes..doc said it was just 1% from the real pain..WHAT?? u'r kidding me rite..it can't be that bad!! Well, wait till you experience it urself..;) And yeah, that morning brought relief to both of us when doc said i was dilated 4-5cm..labor was just around the corner, happy!

1.00 pm

Had lunch..freshen up..packed our bag and relaxed before we go to hospital..

5.00pm

Checked in..we got 1 single bed room with couch.i've been told to change my pant to sarung..i remembered that day i wore hubby's black t-shirt and kain batik..i asked the nurse whether they will give me a hospital gown to wear but they said no..i was like dumbfounded at that time..MISTAKE NO 1: I SHOULD DEMAND A HOSPITAL GOWN/I SHOULD ASK EARLIER WHETHER THEY PROVIDE HOSPITAL GOWN ..it was really uncomfortable with hubby's t-shirt..it was black and hot..if i know that earlier, i will bring my own comfy dress or anything suitable..

My dilation was 5cm..they did CTG on me, i didnt know what that was..but i've been told to push a button on every contractions..my doc came and broke my water..it was clear..no sign of baby's poo or something..it means GOOD..after few minutes i had my water broke, i started to feel the pain of contractions..nurses came and start pasang ape tah..cucuk dekat my wrist..attached a tube..MISTAKE NO 2: IF THEY DONT BOTHER TO TELL YOU WHAT THEY DO TO YOUR BODY, YOU SHOULD ASK OKAY..YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO KNOW..i just assumed they were inducing me..induce means drugs..am i right?

The contractions was still building up..and it got worsen as time goes by..i clutched on a hanky my MIL gave for..cant remember why she gave it to me..berpeluh-peluh..hubby was on my side but he cant do anything..i just focused on my pain..

7.00pm

I remember that everyone started busying themselves and got ready to break fast..my contractions was building high..hubby just had some kuih..after Maghrib, the nurse sent me to the labor room..there were only me on labor that evening..so all the nurses 'pakat kerumun' and gave full attention on me..rasa mcm princess..eh, boleh mcm tu?? ;)..dilation now was 6-7cm..belum boleh push yer..tp sakit nye, Allah je yang tau..the contractions felt like we going to pass motion..until at one time tu, during contraction, i shouted that i want to pass motion..the nurse encouraged me to do it and said it was okay..URGHH..lg malu!

8.30pm

Contraction was unbearable..kalau sape tgk i masa tu, mst rasa i macam hantu, berpeluh2, rambut dh gerbang basah sticky macam ape tah...nurse suggested to take that laughing gas..cant remember the scientific name..but i guessed it was helpful..i felt dizzy and high..like u'r on ecstasy..i can smile again..dah lalok la dikatakan..hehe..i sucked in the gas whenever i felt the contraction..sgt baik okay all the nurses..tlg suapkan air..tlg picit pinggang n belakang masa contraction..sgt teruk rasanye masa tu..frequently i remembered my mom..i thought that if she can bear this pain, so do i..t'was kinda motivation to me at that time..i could hear hubby n nurses chit-chatted but my mind was focusing on the pain..t'was like my mind is empty except the reflection of my mom n remembering Allah.

9.30pm

Bla..bla..bla..after almost 4 hours went through the labor pain, finally my doc came after nurse checked that i was fully dilated..10cm..i was very tired at that time and suddenly when i heard that news, i got bersemangat again, time to push..i push whenever i felt the contraction..firstly i was like screaming with my eyes shut..tp nurse cakap jgn push mcm tu..dont scream coz i'll lose my energy..i've been told to open my eyes and focus on my tummy..until today i still dont know whats the relevant of doing so..felt like my eyes gonna pop-out in anytime masa push tu..push push push, baby still tak mau keluar lg..suddenly i heard whispers among the nurses that i might be on C-Section operation because the baby had suddenly turned inside and making it harder for the baby to come out normally..

I found out later that my doc had ask my hubby whether hubby thinks im tough or not to get through this..and hubby so confident in me he said yes..so the doc kept on encouraging me to push all my heart out..and yes, that's what i did and finally at 10.16pm, my baby Eimaan Harith had breathe his first air in this world..:)

10.16pm

Leganya Allah saja yg tahu..macam mengeluarkan satu batu yg besar..(bak kata my SIL, when i asked her how it feels like to give birth..n yes u'r right SIL Leha..i felt the same way too)..Tears and smile on my face..Mulut tak henti mengucapkan syukur ya Allah..the baby was on my tummy while the doc cut his cord..i cant see his face yet, dia baring mengiring membelakangkan i but i remembered i touch his soft slimy skin..oh wow,that was amazing feeling.



Eimaan Harith first photo ;)

Flasback to August 2010-Days before delivery

My due was on 25th August 2010..i knew my baby will come out sooner or later than that..from some of my friends experience, 1st baby would be later..still i insisted to take leave 2 weeks earlier than my due date..1stly, mmg dah tak larat sgt nak keje..2ndly, just to avoid the risk terbersalin awal di putrajaya where hubby n family is not around..Lastly, just want to spend quality time with hubby before the baby come out and of course last minute preparation.. ;)

If im not mistaken, i had to go for check-up once a week started week 36 of my pregnancy..cant' remember when is the exact week baby's head got engaged..but on the 2nd week of August, i started my long maternity leave..baby was just 36 weeks old inside..it was 2 days before Ramadhan and i managed to fast for two days that year..

2nd Ramadhan night, we went check-up with my private O&G, Dr. Kartik..yes it's a HE..;) malu *blush* *blush*..he was my sister in law's O&G too before this and hubby immediatey chose him when we knew i was pregnant..that night on my 37 weeks, my doc checked baby's head and confirmed it was already engaged..and then he said, 'ok, now it's time to check dilation'..okaaayyy, i dont know what that was..but when the nurse ushered me to this diff room with bed this time, i got freaked out..yeahh, i was so blushed..terkepit-kepit..the nurse cakap nanti nak bersalin sama jer..lagi la..huhu..the test was quite painful..but my doc ni sgt la gentle..dgn suara lembutnye..very gentle..and then he said 'done' with smiles on his face..he asked if i had any symptoms, contraction or anything, i said no..i feel very fine and no pain at all..when the three of us, doc , hubby and me finally sat at his table, then only he told us that my opening was 2cm already..*TAKUT + excited*

He started explaining about delivery and episiotomy (lg takuttt)..he also said if my dilation kept on progressing, i will deliver my baby in few days..from that on, i've been told to be alert on any contractions..okayy..next day, i spotted blood on panty..CUAK..that night, jumpa doc lagi..he said my opening 3 cm..but still cannot admit to hospital yet..the next day, again blood on panty..jumpa doc, opening decreased to 2cm..aikk..main2 ye baby..the same day that evening, i spotted blood again but a bit byk dari biase and went to the doc again and the dilation increased 3cm..hurm cannot bersalin lagi..lepak at MIL's house and joined nieces n nephew coloring with crayons.,;)

FINALLY, on the 5th Ramadhan, i remember it was Sunday..2010 Aug 15 morning, the dilation was 4-5cm and i've been asked to 'check-in' at Putra Specialist Hospital at 5pm..yippee.cant wait.i remember the excitement and wished it'll be over soon..sgt tak larat dah okay membawa badan yg berat with sleepless nights due from the back aches..tak tau tu yang once baby dah keluar lagi la tak dapat tido..hihi..

Summary: some people dpt simptom pecah ketuban, some tanda darah..i got the second one..dengarnye, bila pecah ketuban, masa yg diambil utk bersalin akan lebih cepat compare to tanda darah..i took 3 days since i spotted that blood on my panty before i delivered Eimaan Harith..

OK.end of story before delivery..gonna write entry about 'during labor' once im free..;) * LOVE LOVE *



Putra Specialist Hospital Batu Pahat

New blog, New entry

Hi mommies..

This is my second blog after my magical moments.. I created this blog solely to share issues regarding mommyhood, my kid's development and some of my personal views..

Let me introduce myself..im a mommy of 19 months cheeky-boy named Eimaan Harith..a wifey to a wonderful husband..and that's a three of us..yeah..and still counting..not like there's already a baby inside but yes, we want MORE!! InsyaAllah..

Im a fulltime housewife..used to work as a System Analyst in Ministry of Education..tendered resignation after 5 months having lil Eimaan..yeah, that was my sacrifice..Alhamdulillah, a year has passed and im coping well with this new status..Thanks Allah for making it happen..

For now my focus is 100% hubby and baby..

Gonna catch up with ya'll later..

Mental Note: Im not good in writing..i might be lazy and busy to update entries..no one interested to read my junks..i have no interesting things to share..but yeah, im determined this time.

p.s: this blog is dedicated to Eimaan Harith and daddy Nazri..;)

LOVE

eid-ul-fitr 2011-three of us